All the great adventures worth going on involve taking risks.
The risk is that you might fail.
If it is a physical journey like crossing the dessert, then the risk is you might die.
If it’s an emotional journey like overcoming anger, then the risk is your ego might die.
If it’s a health journey, then the risk is your old habits might die.
If there was no risk at all it would mean the outcome was certain. If the outcome is certain it means you don’t have to do anything to get it…because it is certain.
If you don’t have to do anything then there is no real journey, and if there is no journey then there is no adventure.
Adventure is something a lot of people can’t handle, the uncertainty of it creates too much tension inside them and freaks them out. For them a normal life of predictability seems preferable, but at a deeper level they are choosing predictability because they fear ‘death’.
But without some level of variety in life even these people would die of boredom, and so sooner or later the urge rises in us all to go and do something different from time to time.
If we resist this, if we become stuck in our ways, life has a way of tossing us upside down to make sure we challenge ourselves. Most of the time this is exactly what we don’t want…but usually it is what we need. There’s a clichéd story to it!
On the other side of human nature are people who live lives of constant upheaval – jobs that expose us to endless unpredictability, relationships that keep us on our toes, challenges that stretch us to the limit of our ability.
Without some degree of inner peace, these people too will die. We all lie naturally somewhere on the spectrum between the extremes of excess boredom or excess stimulation.
Fertility can be lost in people who are bored with life and lack direction or purpose, and it is also lost by people who live in a constant state of ‘go’.
If you find yourself excessively bored then choose to become responsible for something new that matters to you, and then work towards making it happen.
If you are living with your foot on the accelerator and fear burn out, then relinquish some responsibility and take more time out with yourself.
If you don’t do one of these things, then life will do it for you and usually it won’t be at a time of your choosing.
For many of my clients, infertility is the wall they have hit that forces them to take stock. My job is to show them where the ladders are.